Somewhere I Belong
by JupLuna
Summary: *song fic* Makoto has a dream of her death on the Moon Kingdom. Can someone help her get over the pain?


This is a song fic I decided to write to pass the time. The song is "Somewhere I Belong" by Linkin Park. Yes I know the song just came out…but it's good. Anyway, this is Makoto/Duo, and I know not too many people enjoy that pairing, but it actually worked out in this story very well. Please read before you judge it. ^_^

Warning: This is a bit angsty, but has a happy ending. And no bashing me for OOCness.

  
  
  
  
**(When this began)  
I had nothing to say   
And I get lost in the nothingness inside of me **

She looked up with a glare. The first hit was his, but she would not let that stop her. She stood up defiantly and thought through the next wave of her attack. She grew angry about the fact that he was so easily led astray and how their love was reduced to nothing more than memories. She made a pact with herself that she would not give into the game that Beryl was playing with them all. She would not feel guilty over having to kill her lover. Her emerald orbs looked him over for any weakness he may show. She narrowed her eyes at his left knee, which he always left unguarded, even during their sparing matches. She struck out with her right fist, planning on faking him out and dropping down to sweep his legs from under him. He grabbed her fist and turned her arm quickly behind her. He pulled her back closer to him and took a deep breath, smelling her hair.

"You always did have a beautiful scent to you, my love." He cooed into her ear. His long chestnut colored hair tickling her neck.

She shuddered. All she could do was remember all the times walking around the garden's of Jupiter with this man near her. How he used to make her laugh or taught her of the stars and constellations. "You're not the man I love anymore. The man I loved would never have attacked all that he held dear. He would not have destroyed his home, and he would not be trying to kill me." She said softly. Her heart broke, knowing that all she had just spoken was true.

"Then I guess this is goodbye, Princess Makoto." He said lifting his head.

Makoto lowered her head as tears streamed down her face. "Goodbye, Nephrite." She glowed a brilliant green encompassing all those around her, demon; human; lost love, within it. When it had faded only she remained, fallen and silent on the surface of the moon. Her breath slowed as her heart stopped.

****

(I was confused)   
And I live it all out to find  
That I'm not the only person with these things in mind   


Makoto woke with a start, panting. Tears ran down from her cheeks and pooled on her pillow. She brought her knees to her chest and held herself in sorrow. The tears continued to fall even as the phone started ringing. She didn't want to deal with anyone right now. Minako's voice broke her out of her internal sorrows.

"Makoto, please I need to speak with you." She said over the machine. She sounded weak, like she had been crying, and needed human contact. 

Makoto slowly picked up the phone. "Hey, Mina-chan." Makoto said sadly. The tears were slowing, but still came. Makoto tried to block out the last part of her dream, the fact that she had not only killed Nephrite and herself, but also those innocents that fought to protect the Moon Kingdom.

"You too Mako-chan?" Minako asked sadly.

Makoto sighed and stood from her bed. She slowly walked out to her living room and threw open the French doors. She stood in the cold night in nothing but fuzzy green slippers, long dark green silk pajama pants and a short silk tank top that matched. Her long chocolate brown hair flew behind her in the chilled breeze. She closed her eyes before looking to the moon. "I could never really remember how we had died in our past life. I hoped that it was a memory that would remain hidden forever. The dream was so vivid, like I lived it a second time. I felt all those old feelings, the love, betrayal, and even the sickening envy of those few that died without having known what pain love would really be." She spoke quietly into the phone.

Minako paused before telling her tale. "So many deaths because we couldn't be strong enough to just deal with our own problems. A flash of light and all those in a hundred-foot radius are all gone, as if they never existed in the first place. I had only meant to take Kunzite and my own life, but all those innocents." She cried into the phone.

****

(Inside of me)   
But all that they can see the words revealed   
Is the only real thing that I've got left to feel

Days turned into weeks and those around her noticed the change. Makoto withdrew from all that she had thrown herself into. She was the only one still having the horrible dream of her death every night. Minako was already back to chasing after her current crush. Usagi and Mamoru decided to just go and elope for fear of loosing one another again. They were already happy living the life as a married couple. Rei grieved over the remembered loss of Jadeite. She spent most of her days praying before the great fire, but even she was slowly getting back to her normal routine. Ami had turned into her books even more. The memories of Zoysite had haunted her, but her dreams quickly vanished. Makoto's dreams stayed however. Every night she would wake up in a cold sweat, tears running down her face.

Makoto sat in her living room, staring at the TV even though it had nothing on it. Her eyes had grown dull and lifeless. Her hair remained down, hiding her face and sorrow. She refused to answer her phone and even when at far as to unplug it. Her door remained locked, bolted up tight so that no one, not even Usagi, who held the spare key, could get in. She had given up on a peaceful night of sleep, and slowly she was giving up on life as well.

****

  
(Nothing to lose)   
Just stuck, hollow and alone   
And the fault is my own, and the fault is my own

Makoto walked slowly into school the day after break was officially over. She had barely left her apartment during the month she had off from school. The most she did was go out to get food, and even then she ordered ahead so it was all waiting at the store ready for her. She hated herself for acting and being so weak, but the dreams which had only just finally stopped, had taken their toll and claimed her soul. She walked the halls an empty shell of what she once had been. She cowered away from people and their touch. The Karate Maniac was no more and may never be again. Makoto feared even looking at another person, she feared that death would come to those that she should be protecting. She closed her eyes and leaned against a nearby wall. She couldn't do this. The noise, the people, they were all getting to her, adding to her already growing fear. She wanted to crawl in a hole and stay there until the end of time, but she knew that she would be needed, not her, Sailor Jupiter would be needed to keep the peace that had finally been granted to them. She opened her eyes determined. "I will not let my dreams beat me." She told herself.**  
  
I wanna heal, I wanna feel what I thought was never real   
I wanna let go of the pain I've felt so long  
(Erase all the pain till it's gone)  
I wanna heal, I wanna feel like I'm close to something real  
I wanna find something I've wanted all along   
Somewhere I belong   
**

She walked into her first class, determined to do well. She refused to be a coward. She sat behind a boy with a long chestnut colored braid. The memory of long brown hair tickling her neck went through her mind. She shivered as she sat it the vacant seat. The boy turned slowly around and grinned from ear to ear. Memories of laughing in tall fields of wild flowers came back to her, and that same carefree smile.

"Hi, my name's Duo, Duo Maxwell." He said putting out his hand.

She looked at the hand and slowly extended hers. She noted how strong his grip was and how callused it was as well. He was someone that worked with his hands a lot, perhaps a carpenter or mechanic.

"And your name?" He asked with a smile.

She smiled slightly. "My name is Makoto Kino." She said softly.

"Well you have a hell of a hand shake Mako-chan." He said grinning again. "Remind me not to get on your bad side." He said winking.

Makoto blushed slightly. Perhaps being around people would help her out.

****

  
And I've got nothing to say  
I can't believe I didn't fall right down on my face

She walked out of the school exhausted. She had not been around so many people, in such a long time, that it tired her out. Her friends were nowhere to be found now that school had ended. She thought about going to the temple, knowing they would be there to finish their homework, but she didn't want to have to deal with the pressure and flak she would get about closing in on herself for so long. She turned to walk home when she ran into someone, literally. She felt herself falling to the ground, but strong arms grabbed her and held her close. She heard her books hit the cement, but all she could do was hold her breath. The strength in the arms, the way they held her close, it all reminded her too much of the past life she was struggling to forget.

"Nephrite." She said softly.

****

  
(I was confused)   
Looking everywhere only to find  
That it's not the way I had imagined it all in my mind

Makoto opened her eyes to find herself looking at a blond boy holding her books to her.

"Here you go miss." He said kindly.

She blinked and blushed. The arms still held her close even though she was no longer falling. She turned her head slowly and saw Duo's amethyst eyes looking into hers deeply. He seemed almost troubled. He slowly let her go. She turned and took her books back from the boy. He too looked a little shocked at the name she had quietly spoke of.

The blond shook himself from his thoughts and extended his hand. "My name is Quatre Raberba Winner."

She took the hand and shook it slowly. "Makoto Kino."

Duo smiled at the blond. "Hey Quat-man, good of you to save Mako-chan's books for her."

Makoto looked to the shorter boy and saw him blush slightly. She smiled slightly and bowed. "Thank you for picking them up for me."

His blush grew even wider as he bowed his head. Makoto turned to leave but her elbow was held by Duo. He was still searching her eyes for something it seemed to her. She shivered under the heavy gaze, but didn't move. He felt familiar, as if he could possibly be the embodiment of her lost love, but the only thing visually the same was the color of his hair. Makoto knew he had a love of space, as he talked about nothing else during their lunch conversation, but that was where the similarities ended. Yet it felt so familiar, and it scared her. It scared her a lot.

****

  
(So what am I)   
What do I have but negativity   
'Cause I can't trust to find the way, everyone is looking at me 

She could take it no longer. She pushed past Duo and started running as if her life depended on it. She could hear him calling her name, but she ignored him. She couldn't deal with it. If Duo really was Nephrite reborn, she didn't want it to end that same way. She didn't want to bring him into her heart just to loose him again. She cursed herself as she ran home, crying tears that she thought she had used up halfway through her month of self-imprisonment. She ran up the stairs and slammed the door behind her. She fell on the sofa and hugged herself tightly rocking back and forth. She didn't want to trust her feelings, even though they had never lied to her before. She kept thinking about how simple it had been before getting her memories back. She would do anything to go back to being in the dark, because this knowledge was killing her.

****

  
(Nothing to lose)   
Nothing to gain, hollow and alone   
And the fault is my own, and the fault is my own 

There was a knock on the door but she ignored it. She cursed silently as she heard it open and remembered she had forgotten to lock it. The intruder quietly closed the door and seemed to be looking around in the dark. Makoto was on alert. This person had never been in her home, she could tell. They looked around as if searching for a way through the dark, where as all her friends knew her house as well as their own. She saw the figure walk closer before tripping and falling over the nearby love seat. A male voice cursed. Makoto turned on the light next to her and glared at the braided boy.

"Fancy meeting you here." Duo joked as he pretended to relax in the awkward position her had landed in.

Makoto just stared angrily at him. "I want to be alone, and how did you find my house?"

Duo straightened himself on the couch and looked at Makoto as he had done in front of the school. "I can't leave you alone, Makoto. As to how I found your house, you dropped this." He said handing over her wallet.

She grabbed the wallet and threw it on the table. "Thank you, now get out." She growled.

"I can't. You said something this afternoon that I meant to ask you about, but I couldn't find the words." Duo said looking at his hands. His normally happy face was lost in thought.

"And what would that have been?" Makoto asked a little fearful.

"The name you said, after I caught you. I've been called that before." He said.**  
  
I wanna heal, I wanna feel what I thought was never real   
I wanna let go of the pain I've felt so long  
(Erase all the pain till it's gone)  
I wanna heal, I wanna feel like I'm close to something real  
I wanna find something I've wanted all along   
Somewhere I belong   
**

Makoto looked up into Duo's eyes. "Long ago, the woman I loved called me that. She called me that up until the time when I was supposed to kill her." Duo said sadly.

Makoto's eyes watered. "Who used to call you that?" She asked quietly.

"The most beautiful woman I had ever known. She was a Princess, with Amazon like qualities. She was the love of my life until I was brainwashed into forgetting all about the happy times we had." Duo said grabbing her hands.

"I've been having dreams." He said. "Dreams of the Princess and myself on our final day together. She sacrificed herself to make sure I didn't hurt any other people. What she didn't know is that I was the one that killed the people around us before we both died."

Makoto held her breath. All the death she had thought was on her own hands, were not caused by her at all. "Duo, what does this have to do with me?" She asked looking at their now joined hands.

"Makoto, Princess Makoto, Princess of Jupiter, I remember what I have done and I understand if you wish to forget about me." Duo said sadly. "But I am no longer that person. With this new life I have changed drastically, some for the better, others not, but I know that in my heart I still love you."

Makoto's eyes spilled their tears. She wanted to belong. She wanted her lost love back like Usagi had gotten hers, but she was afraid that history would just repeat itself. She rose slowly and sat in his lap, hugging him as a lifeline. She didn't care about fear anymore…she couldn't. She cried into his shoulder as he held her and just rocked her gently. All this time Makoto had pulled away for the safety of others, now she was giving into that and was finally doing what her heart told her to. She was doing something for herself.**  
  
I will never know myself until I do this on my own  
And I will never feel anything else until my wounds are healed  
I will never be anything till I break away from me  
I will break away and find myself today  
**

Makoto and Duo's relationship wasn't all happiness, but neither of them truly thought it would be. They both had to find themselves and find their limits before the relationship would work. The scouts were surprised to find that the Gundam pilots were the reincarnations of their past loves. Wufei had once been Jadeite, but the only similarity was the love of history. Quatre had once been Kunzite, the only remaining similarity was his planning and strategies. Trowa had once been Zoysite, only known because of his tendency to be someone withdrawn. Heero had also been from the Moon Kingdom. He was the Moon's top general. Both groups had to come to terms with who they were, and if they would let that get in the way of who they were now.

Makoto and Duo could care less. They felt connected even if not by their past lives. Through this life they shared many similarities about how they grew up, and what they had to deal with. They learned and grew emotionally from each other. 

****

  
I wanna heal, I wanna feel what I thought was never real   
I wanna let go of the pain I've felt so long  
(Erase all the pain till it's gone)  
I wanna heal, I wanna feel like I'm close to something real  
I wanna find something I've wanted all along   
Somewhere I belong   


Makoto and Duo moved out of Japan to America. They wanted to have a few years alone to grow and mature before they were thrown into helping create an entire empire. They married one night, during a meteor shower. Although they still had wounds from the past that would not heal, they had each other, and for them, that was enough because it was real.**  
  
I wanna heal, I wanna feel like I'm somewhere I belong  
I wanna heal, I wanna feel like I'm somewhere I belong  
Somewhere I belong**

Thank you for reading my story. I've always wanted to do a story where the G-boys were the reincarnated generals. Please review and tell me what you think.

Thanks again. ^_^


End file.
